‘Morning dad’ I greet as I tread pass dad to grab the cereal box. I tip in some milk from the pitcher, cereal loops and fragments of chocolate into my bowl.
            After all that’s happened throughout the weekend, I’m left as one hungry monster. ‘Morning to you too, sweetheart’ Dad slurs as he observes me handle my food clumsily. I finally settle down with a broad morning grin; setting my bowl on the table. I’m not typically a morning person yet believe me, smiling during mornings regardless of it being insincere generates a less conflicted morning. I pluck off my phone from its charger to turn it on for the first time today. Have I been living in the Stone Age? It feels like a decade since I last explored the obscured contents of my phone. The first thing I recognized was my social media notifications that has been stockpiling. Have people been messaging me? I quickly avert to my inboxes. I usually don’t open social media merely because I don’t frequently text and the majority of mortals on planet Earth don’t even recognize my existence. But it seems as if today’s a lot different. I was curious as to why people had started to text me thus I decide to open one of the many texts on the topmost segment of my notification list.
            Then a picture pops up on the screen, and I was not delighted at all. It’s a picture of my white polished bum on the Potty. My bum isn’t at its absolute entirety in the picture, yet it’s still horrific needless to say. The worst of it all is that it just happens to be mildly censored with a blur. I don’t see why it has to be censored though. In fact, nothing but my ‘I love farting’ panties is showing. It’s only going to make people assume things about the picture. But to set things straight, I’m not totally surprised this happened. I saw this coming. Remember the two rascals who’d spied me with their binoculars, while I crapped? It was Stephan Burley and Burger, his little friend. They had apparently brought a camera and snapped an image. Stephan Burley must have shared the photo with his brother, Otto, who just happens to be one of the superior jocks at school. I cuss under my breath. Apparently, all the other messages people from school had sent me either contained that degrading picture or a disgusting personalized remark about it. ‘Dad, may I stay home today? I think I’ve caught a severe cold.’ I lie. I simply don’t think I can ever abide the humiliation if I ever show up at school, with the knowledge of that recent picture tragedy that must’ve already tarnished my reputation.
            ‘Learn to bear with it honey. You were incredibly fine this morning. I’m sure it will fade eventually’ He suggests.
            ‘Please?’ I plead, sniffing my nose continuously as if to pretend to have caught an awry cold.
            Dad shakes his head. ‘Never miss a day of school, honey. It’s your obligation as a student. Plus, I thought you said you have an exam coming up today?’
            ‘Nobody cares about the exam! Are you sure I can’t stay just for today?’ I whine, pounding my fists on the table.
            ‘That’s guaranteed.’ Dad repeats as he dumps the dishware in the sink. I pout at him, knowing that there isn’t a point in arguing as he will always win nevertheless. ‘Don’t you think you should be heading off now? You don’t want to be late.’ Dad reprimands.
            I roll my eyes and jolt up, partly furious that dad won’t let me be absent for merely a day of school. I sling my bag over my shoulder and plant a peck on his cheek, ‘Bye dad.’
            I gear up the car engine and drive out of the carport. I don’t want to face any of my fellow friends with them ever having that picture in mind. Am I now portrayed as a slut? No longer a Mormon I’m sure. I can’t believe that the universe is doing this to me in just the span of a couple days. There’s so little left that I can endure before splitting my brain. As I drive past our complex, I see a familiar figure strolling along the sidewalk. I decelerate my pace to discern the being. He looks somewhat like Howard; 100% physical resemblance, in fact. I want to pull over in case it is he, but with all that’s happened earlier today; I don’t think I care anymore. I drive past the boy and hustle all the way to school. The second I walk through the double doors, gasps and mutters can be heard. They’re all clearly gossiping about my particular incident. My heart is racing at a pace that even the mighty Usain Bolt can’t manage. I’m in the verge of sobbing blood due to all the negative attention being directed towards me. I plunge my head down timidly and bolt away to the classroom like a coward. Fortunately, Ms. Aaliyah coincidentally came early today and thus I was let in the classroom earlier.
            When lunch break rolls around, I wasn’t content. The sound of the bell reverberates within the room followed by glorious chants. This is a session that’s supposed to be wonderful. Yet for the first time ever today, the idea of lunch nauseates me. As I slump out and away from class, I see Sapphira approach me with worry on her face. She’s perhaps one of the very few trustworthy and candid friends I have here at school. ‘I heard of what happened.’ She says, inserting herself to position beside me.
            ‘Well, hasn’t everyone?’ I sigh as I walk alongside her through the corridors. Indeed, for now I’m using her as a shield to safeguard me from all the faces of mockery students along the halls are shooting me.
            ‘The news definitely circulated quickly. But is the snapshot a fake though?’ She asks.
            ‘If it is I wouldn’t have been depressed’ I sigh.
            Seriously? How did that come to be?’ She asks, scrunching her eyebrows together. ‘I know you Astrid and you’re not that type of person who’d disrobe with the windows open’
            ‘It’s a long, awful tale. You really don’t want to know, Sappie’ I reply with a disconsolate frown. I slant my head sideways to notice a set of people pointing their index towards me while snickering. Within each of their palms is a crumpled piece of paper. I hear one of them count to three and by the third count; each one of them begins to toss the crumbled paper at my direction.
            Sapphira watches with a gawk as those bullies maltreat me before sprinting straightaway. That was uncalled for. ‘Unbelievable.’ I hear her say in disbelief. I crouch down upset; burying my face within both palms. She hunkers down beside me and pats my back as if to soothe me down. ‘Bastards’ I hear her mumble to herself as she picks up one of the crumpled papers. She lays the sheet on her lap before straightening it. As soon as she did, her eyes grow wide. She nudges my shoulder and hands the paper over to show me. As predicted; it’s the same picture of my ass on the potty.
            ‘You seriously have to confront the jerks that started this.’ She advises, standing up to tidy her pink skirt; smoothing out its crinkly edges.
            ‘Perhaps all the mocking will ward off by tomorrow’ I suggest as I look up at her; still frozen in a squat.
            ‘You don’t want to be harassed forever, do you? They deserve to rot in hell’ Sapphira emphasizes. I grin weakly at her while shaking my head. ‘Now aren’t you going to eat lunch?’ She queries. I shake my head again in response. She sighs, ‘You shouldn’t dwell over it too much, you know. It’s unhealthy for you. But it’s even unhealthier that you’re using that as an excuse to skip lunch.’ She reprimands, placing her hands on her hips.
            ‘I know’ I say, burying my face inside my hands again.
            ‘Well, I’m going to get going regardless, and you should too before you die of starvation.’ She states with an arm resting over her stomach to indicate appetite before proceeding to head off. For a moment, my mind was conflicted upon whether or not I should confront the jocks who did this to me. Part of me argued that I should, whereas the other disagrees.    Yet ultimately, I end up deciding upon Sapphira’s advice. I bit by bit neared the cafeteria; glancing over the enormous glass windows occasionally to skim the inside. It didn’t take long for me to spot them—in other words, the popular squad. I spot the clan having lunch in their regular round table in the center of the rowdy cafeteria. They look to be having the most fun, as usual—babbling and ranting to themselves. I try to discern the identities around the table. Otto Burley is among them. He’s the one who’d initially acquired the copies from Stephan, and hence he must’ve been the one who’d distributed it. Otto—the notorious relative of the devil who snapped the authentic images. I try to propel my courage to confront them and ask to retain the copies back, yet I can’t help but feel belittle already. You can do this, Astrid; I try to invigorate myself. It’s now or never. Not wanting to waste more time, I barge in the cafeteria. I step in front of their circular table; intruding their conversation. ‘I’m here to request the copies back’ I stammer, clutching onto Otto’s shoulder blade firmly. He was startled upon my sudden grip, but his expression was quick to divert back to mendacity.
            ‘What copies?’ Otto pretends to be oblivious.
            ‘Don’t act as if you don’t know! The copies of my picture you’d immorally distributed! That was fucking insolent of you to have done that to me!’ I yell at him, now being at the edge of my temper.
            All the girls around the table sneer upon my presence. ‘Oh, we’re so afraid!’ teases one of them in sarcasm.
            ‘I’m impressed with you darling, I’d never thought the saintly Astrid Sherman could ever dare to swear’ He mocks me with a wide-stretched smirk I so badly want to rip off his face.
            ‘Shut up! All I’m asking for are the copies!’ I fume.
            Otto chuckles devilishly and yields out a bunch of papers from his bag. ‘Do you mean these?’ He smirks, holding up those picture pages. I reach my arm out to retain them, but he keeps on inching them away from me. My whole body is soon inclined against their table with my legs dangling off of the edge. My hands are flopping everywhere as I struggle to get ahold of those sheets.
            ‘Give me those!’ I stammer, in the verge of bursting into tears. Through my brawl with the notorious Otto Burley atop that wooden table, I inadvertently come a across a very familiar sight.
            ‘Howard?’ Our eyes meet. As soon as he hears me call him out, his eyes grow wide and his jaw drops in astonishment.
            ‘Astrid…?’ He mutters; eyes wide open. Why is he here in Woodcreek High? He’s supposed to be stray miles away; burning neighborhood houses or riding camels in the Sahara desert. The idea of Howard being a student isn’t so affable. And yet here he is. He remains speechless alike I, too stunned to even utter a single phrase. We attend the same school, don’t we? Is it that he’s been nowhere to be spotted or is it that I’m too blind to acknowledge his existence here?
            Howard watches as I helplessly endeavor to tug away the papers from his friend’s grip. Isn’t he going to help me? ‘Bro, just hand her the papers.’ Howard asserts, patting his friend on the shoulder. Yet Otto flouts him and persists to play tag with me. I can see an expression of discontent on Howard’s face. He quickly pulls his friend off of me, allowing me to seize the papers, ‘I wasn’t going to repeat myself, just give her the papers!’ Howard emphasizes, his eyes flashing into bloodshot red for one blink.
            His friend looks extremely peeved, ‘what’s gone into you man? Did you magically turn good overnight?’ Otto glares at Howard; utterly vexed.
            ‘They’re all yours’ Howard assures me, referring to the copies now in my hands. I nod at him coyly and proceed to scurry away. I don’t want to witness a couple of mad teenage boys brawl it out with one another. Although, I must confess, that that was incredibly sweet and I feel very flattered of him. As I head away, I can’t help but feel a surge of guilt overwhelm me to acknowledge how he now has to bear being grilled with questions by his presently skeptical mates.
            I hear Howard try to soothe down his group of pals. ‘Why’d you do that!?’ I hear another question him.
            ‘Chill out guys! Let her have the copies!’ Howard insists; patting his friend’s back. He then pauses for a moment before muttering something I would never anticipate for him to say. ‘We have the original.’  Right as those words fly out of his mouth, I feel a painful compression within my chest. It’s as if I’m being struck with a vane. I promptly collapse to the floor; my arms unleashing all that I’m holding to the grounds surrounding me. What he said was absolutely staggering and insulting. Following his witty quote, I hear the clan’s triumphant chants. I watch in agony as they give each other fist-pumps while I sit frozen on the ground. All the copies are bestrewn over me. I feel completely disparaged and in the verge of raining some buckets of sorrow. I thought we were in good terms. I thought he liked me.
            The dangerous side of Astrid would’ve probably run the dipshit over with a Jeep. Yet the susceptible, affectionate and dominating chamber of me still has the compassion to want to talk this through with him. He’s got a lot of explanation to do and I am curious as of how he’ll address things. I observe as the other scholars tread by me in their conceited gaits; snickering and pointing. It doesn’t feel any good being perceived fragile by other people. Hence, I pick my own ass up and compose myself. In this world, we’re really all alone. I proceed to class, with my chin up. Everybody has their eyes fixated on me as if I’m one sort of extraterrestrial creature. I sigh heavily, pondering on about Howard. I have decided that I’m going to give the boy another chance for him to deliberately disclose matters.
            By the time the final bell rings, I’m first to pack up. School’s finally over and the immediate thing I do is trail closely behind Howard without his notice. Apparently, he has scheduled soccer practice today and thus I’ve to wait for him to finish. Certainly, his disclosure can wait until tomorrow, but I don’t think I’m able to wait that long. This piercing embitterment in my heart is too painful and I can’t contain the urge for too long. I need to talk to him. I sit myself in quietude on the bleachers, obscuring my nose behind a magazine. I have a black-rimmed, circular-framed pair of glasses sitting over the bridge of my nose. I don’t usually wear glasses at home—as a matter of fact, my eyesight isn’t bad at all. Yet for some reason, I prefer wearing them at school over not.
            Fortunately for me, girls dominate the bleachers and thus it’s relatively difficult for me to get noticed. It’s pretty rowdy and noisy of all the cheering and shouting and thus ultimately, I wasn’t able to concentrate on my magazine as much as I’d planned to. It’s in conclusion, pretty perturbing. I hope that he’s worth the wait. Hours and hours roll by and soccer practice is finally coming to a finish. I see Howard jog away hastily from the field alone whilst his mates remain; seemingly to extend their practice time. I creep closely behind him, after ensuring that nobody is around to inadvertently catch a glimpse of me—because if anybody does, they are likely to assume fictional things. They’ll label me a possessive fan girl or dub me even more insulting nicknames. If that comes to be, I’ll probably be faced with a collection of death threats from Howard’s genuine group of admirers. Then my reputation will be more tarnished than it already is.
            He then enters the male changing room. I contemplate to myself; should I follow him still? Right then, Dad’s wise words reverberate within my head; in order to succeed, have the courage to pioneer. That was one of the many quotes dad would stress to me through the years that followed mum’s decease. Dad is a very daring man. As an entrepreneur, he consistently has to take leaps of faith because he’s faced with new challenges each day. Inspirational sayings were passed on to him by his father and he’d passed them on to me. Those reminders are what help him pull through. They’d also turned me into the bold person that I am today.
            Fingers-crossed, I hop across to surpass the borders between the change room and the outside. I pray that it’s not going to reek of hormones inside there. I pave through; standing on the edge of my toes to produce the least sound for every step. It doesn’t take long for me to recognize how solitary it is inside. There’s absolutely nobody else there aside Howard and I. Regardless of that, I choose to obscure myself behind anything mammoth just in case somebody pops up all of a sudden. I glance over the wall, my eyes peeking through and skimming the area in search of Howard. Out of the blue, I feel large hands rest upon my shoulders.
            ‘Hey’ a raspy male voice resonates, making me shudder slightly. I twist my body back to face the person and feel my head collide against his upper body. I jerk away instantly, tilting my head up to look at him—Howard. His head’s plummeted down and his wet fringe is swept over his secretive eyes. ‘Astrid, I…’ He murmurs, his warm breaths being heaved against my pale cheeks; caressing it.
            I scoff internally, ‘What? Do you have any idea how scarring your words were?’ I stammer, struggling to resist the urge of breaking out in tears. I don’t want to seem like a vulnerable child in front of him.
            ‘I do understand Astrid, and I’m here to apologize. I didn’t mean it. I just didn’t know what to do or say, or the proper way to react.’ He utters. ‘Can I be forgiven?’ he brings his hand to gently hold the tip of my chin.
            I gasp upon his impudence and clout his hand away from touching my face, ‘No you don’t understand Howard! After everything I’d done for you that night, this is how you’re going to treat me!? You’re not forgiven because you’re not even genuinely apologizing!’ I yelp. I notice a slight tremor on his hands upon my words. I may sound like an idiot for minding a bastard that I’ve only known for a couple of days—and yes, I admit I am one. Sadly, I can’t help myself. He’s poison, and I’m poisoned. Perhaps it’s because he’d seen me in my frailest state. He’d seen me cry and that’s my mistake. Nobody has ever witnessed a tear from me ever since the death of my mother. Most say, I’ve grown numb—and for the most part, I agree.
            ‘No, Astrid. I promise I’d explain to you everything. Just give me another chance.’ He implores. Quietude overtakes the room. I can only stare at him in disbelief and contempt. Howard eventually nears me, his limbs reaching out wide-agape, as if wanting to envelope me within his arms. I roll my eyes. Does he think I’m stupid? This is just another one of his classic affable moves to try and woo me into still sympathizing with him. He’d done this to me before and perhaps many other victims for him to practice. What an arsehole.
            I pound my fists on his chest before recoiling away. ‘You’re a horrible person’ I mutter; disparaging him as I distance myself from him gradually. He has water dripping down and along his neck from his drenched dirty blonde hair. He’d just gotten out of the shower and his skin feels as if it is still mildly saturated in liquid. The pungent smell of him also lingers in this room. A towel is loosely wrapped around his waist. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this attractive before—he is absolutely gorgeous. I’ve already mentioned it before, because it is true—he is charming physically and there’s no denying that. But that still doesn’t kill my fury toward him. Being physically attractive is nothing when wrapped up in a shitty attitude.
            ‘Look at the bright side, Astrid! It looks like we’ll be seeing each other every day!’ Howard gleams in a jovial demeanor. What’s increasingly pissing me off is the fact that he persists to act as if all is okay; when nothing is anymore between us.
            ‘Has anyone ever told you how you’re very terrible with words? Maybe you should taste your words before spitting them out’ I stammer, my lips trembling in rage. Furious, I stride out the door, not forgetting to slam it shut behind me.