One of the reasons why we like to read stories is that we can feel various kinds of feelings and see things from different perspectives. Same with "THROUGH YOU", we are able to experience things although we have different conditions from the characters.
"THROUGH YOU" tells the relationship between two different people, starting from the meeting until they feel comfortable with each other. Sometimes because we have often found this type of story, we can already guess what the storyline will be. But this short story offers quite different things through the characters told and the atmosphere that occurs throughout the story.
The storyline is quite clear, moving forward and immediately begins with a problem. But at the beginning of the story, the author does not adequately explain and tell a number of things, so the character and atmosphere depicted at the beginning are not intact and seemed too rushed so the reader is less eager to continue the story. While reading love stories, we hope to be able to feel various feelings that the characters experience, positive and negative ones. We do not want to be in a hurry like reading an action story but want to feel what the characters experience in the story, felt through various senses so as to make the story more complete.
The middle and end of the story also suffer from the same thing as the beginning of the story. Although the story concept is quite good, if it is not arranged well it will make the story less interesting. In addition, the beginning, middle, and end of the story feel completely separate. Because the beginning of the story is important to attract readers, the middle part is made to approach the main conflict, and the end of the story is used to resolve the conflict.
The characters also experience the same thing with plots, which are less explained. The main character is difficult to like because at the beginning of the story has been written with a bad impression. First impression matters, you like it or not. While the male characters also seem less intact. Dialogues and expositions that appear on the story cannot describe the characters properly so the character feels flat.
The writing style is quite good, the dialogue flows quite naturally. The depiction of the surrounding atmosphere is also quite good at the beginning of the story through dialogue between characters, but in the middle and end it seems that the atmosphere with the scene feels incomplete because it is less explained. Also, the middle and the end can be felt everywhere. Even though the background, both place, time and atmosphere, is very much related to the scene, especially in love stories because it will provide a different atmosphere, which matches the feeling you want to associate in the scene. For instance, the café atmosphere in the morning will certainly be different in the afternoon or evening.
In addition, the author of the missed situation by other senses. The main character is experiencing physical disability, the way he feels the atmosphere is a little different from the supporting characters by relying more on other senses. Authors also tend to be hasty in describing many things, especially in the middle to the end. It seems that the author is reluctant to describe and explain the situation that happened and immediately jumped to new things. This does not mean the author must explain everything that happens to the main character, of course, this will be boring.
Actually, the dialogue between the characters is flowing quite well. But at the end of the story, the main character speaks quite long but feels a little flat. The dialogue that contains a lot of feelings feels unnatural when spoken straight away without stopping as if giving a speech. There would be a nervous stop, perhaps seeing the expression of the guy to make the dialogue more natural.
Grammar is also quite good. Mistakes that can be understood as authors whose main language is not English. Indeed grammar is important in the story, but that is not everything. The most important story is well understood and there are no confusing typos. From this story, the author can string words together so that the story can flow quite well.
In general, this story is quite good. The concept offered is good, but the story still needs some things such as the depiction of the atmosphere and characters. In my opinion, this story is too short because the scene is not balanced with good resolution. Too bad, even though the concept is quite interesting.
"THROUGH YOU" tells the relationship between two different people, starting from the meeting until they feel comfortable with each other. Sometimes because we have often found this type of story, we can already guess what the storyline will be. But this short story offers quite different things through the characters told and the atmosphere that occurs throughout the story.
The storyline is quite clear, moving forward and immediately begins with a problem. But at the beginning of the story, the author does not adequately explain and tell a number of things, so the character and atmosphere depicted at the beginning are not intact and seemed too rushed so the reader is less eager to continue the story. While reading love stories, we hope to be able to feel various feelings that the characters experience, positive and negative ones. We do not want to be in a hurry like reading an action story but want to feel what the characters experience in the story, felt through various senses so as to make the story more complete.
The middle and end of the story also suffer from the same thing as the beginning of the story. Although the story concept is quite good, if it is not arranged well it will make the story less interesting. In addition, the beginning, middle, and end of the story feel completely separate. Because the beginning of the story is important to attract readers, the middle part is made to approach the main conflict, and the end of the story is used to resolve the conflict.
The characters also experience the same thing with plots, which are less explained. The main character is difficult to like because at the beginning of the story has been written with a bad impression. First impression matters, you like it or not. While the male characters also seem less intact. Dialogues and expositions that appear on the story cannot describe the characters properly so the character feels flat.
The writing style is quite good, the dialogue flows quite naturally. The depiction of the surrounding atmosphere is also quite good at the beginning of the story through dialogue between characters, but in the middle and end it seems that the atmosphere with the scene feels incomplete because it is less explained. Also, the middle and the end can be felt everywhere. Even though the background, both place, time and atmosphere, is very much related to the scene, especially in love stories because it will provide a different atmosphere, which matches the feeling you want to associate in the scene. For instance, the café atmosphere in the morning will certainly be different in the afternoon or evening.
In addition, the author of the missed situation by other senses. The main character is experiencing physical disability, the way he feels the atmosphere is a little different from the supporting characters by relying more on other senses. Authors also tend to be hasty in describing many things, especially in the middle to the end. It seems that the author is reluctant to describe and explain the situation that happened and immediately jumped to new things. This does not mean the author must explain everything that happens to the main character, of course, this will be boring.
Actually, the dialogue between the characters is flowing quite well. But at the end of the story, the main character speaks quite long but feels a little flat. The dialogue that contains a lot of feelings feels unnatural when spoken straight away without stopping as if giving a speech. There would be a nervous stop, perhaps seeing the expression of the guy to make the dialogue more natural.
Grammar is also quite good. Mistakes that can be understood as authors whose main language is not English. Indeed grammar is important in the story, but that is not everything. The most important story is well understood and there are no confusing typos. From this story, the author can string words together so that the story can flow quite well.
In general, this story is quite good. The concept offered is good, but the story still needs some things such as the depiction of the atmosphere and characters. In my opinion, this story is too short because the scene is not balanced with good resolution. Too bad, even though the concept is quite interesting.